The great sex recession: how dating apps created a digital caste system
Silicon Valley engineered digital rejection - Ari’s AI levels the playing field
NEW YORK, January 2025 - Silicon Valley's dating platforms have engineered an unprecedented crisis of connection. The average man faces 111 rejections before he lands a single match on a dating app, and success is brutally concentrated: 10% of men capture 90% of all matches, while the bottom half receive 1% of matches. This systematic exclusion has real consequences: one in three young men (ages 18-24) reported no intimacy in recent years, and 63% of men under thirty are single. The crisis has become so severe that in 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General declared loneliness an epidemic, linking it directly to serious mental and physical health implications.
Ari, the AI wing girl built on extensive matchmaking data, is here to help what experts call a fundamentally broken system. Whether a man is swiping on apps, sliding into DMs, or navigating real-world encounters, Ari is their 24/7 dating co-pilot to help them navigate modern dating – from dating apps to social media to real-world encounters – with personalized guidance. Early users report an average 300% increase in dates within the first month of using Ari. This potential has attracted pre-seed investment from leading unicorn founders.
Created by the experts at VIDA Select ,who boast a 78% success rate, Ari’s advice stems from 15 years of online dating expertise where professional ghostwriters have managed millions of messages for high-paying clients who outsource their dating lives for thousands of dollars a month. A recent Norton study found that 64% of online daters want AI assistance with dating. Ari was compiled from millions of messages, tens of thousands of dates, and thousands of successful relationships. She has a distinct personality that is warm, witty, and unafraid to be direct. Typical dating apps only swipe and match, Ari goes further.
Ari’s features include:
Bio Builder: Makes stand-out user profiles designed to spark interest and attract quality matches
Message Magic: Crafts compelling messages that maximize your chances of a response
Ask Ari™: Receive real-time, expert dating advice for any dating scenario
“We're not just launching a product," said Scott Valdez, Co-Founder and CEO of Ari and VIDA. “We’re launching a movement. Men who are overwhelmed by isolation and lack meaningful connections are facing increasing levels of depression and anxiety every day. Ari is here to help level the playing field. Importantly, Ari doesn’t take away the real human element - she empowers it. The real problem isn't too much AI in dating - it’s that we don’t have enough. Our goal is to empower people to form genuine connections.”
Ari is free to try, with premium features available for only $20 per month. Try it now by downloading the app on the Apple Store or Google Play.
About Ari
Founded in June 2024 as a strategic spin-off from VIDA Select, a profitable 7-figure matchmaking business. The story is compelling: After 15 years helping thousands find love through VIDA Select, Scott Valdez witnessed firsthand how the loneliness epidemic was devastating millions of lives. With recent advances in AI, he saw an opportunity to transform VIDA's proven success—30,000+ successful interactions, 9,867 successful dates, and 1,898 happy couples—into an AI solution that could help millions at an affordable price. The data and expertise gained from VIDA Select's success forms the foundation of Ari's AI, ensuring advice is effective and grounded in real-world results.
Leadership
After experiencing firsthand the frustrations of online dating, Scott founded VIDA Select in 2009, quickly transforming it into a profitable 7-figure matchmaking business. Over 15 years, he pioneered data-driven approaches that achieved a 78% success rate, helping create nearly 2000 happy couples. Featured in major media, including CNN, Forbes, and The Washington Post, Scott's expertise in optimizing dating success laid the foundation for Ari. His experience building successful remote teams across 17 countries and scaling VIDA Select without external funding demonstrates his ability to grow businesses efficiently.
A serial entrepreneur and startup veteran, Alex brings deep expertise in scaling consumer technology companies. As Country Manager at Rappi and Senior VP at Betterfly, he led successful international expansions and achieved rapid growth in competitive markets. Previously, he co-founded YaEsta.com, Ecuador's pioneering e-commerce platform, revolutionizing online retail accessibility nationwide. His experience scaling unicorns and earning recognition from eCommerce Institute for ecosystem development makes him ideal for leading Ari's growth strategy.
With 14 years at VIDA Select, Catherine brings unparalleled expertise in dating operations and scaling personalized services. Her deep industry knowledge and experience in optimizing dating success for thousands of clients provide crucial insights for Ari's development and growth.
An AI and machine learning expert with over 8 years of experience developing sophisticated language models at companies like MarketMuse, Ulrich has led four startups to successful market launches. His deep expertise in building personalized AI systems and training complex models is crucial for developing Ari's advanced capabilities.
With three years leading technology at VIDA Select and Enamour, Todd brings critical domain expertise to Ari. He formerly founded Staunch Robots, a successful 7-figure consultancy connecting Silicon Valley companies with top engineering talent from Eastern Europe and Latin America. His technical leadership and experience building high-performance engineering teams positions him perfectly to architect Ari's sophisticated AI platform.
